DESI MATURE TOILET TORTURE SON (ENGLISH SUBS)...

’ ‘Right. Um, thanks, Denise,’ Stan said, after a moment. He continued, quietly, ‘You’re right, of course. A true friend.’ ‘Yes and this true friend’s got work to do!’ said Denise, crisply. Softening, she continued, ‘Are you okay, Stan?’ ‘Yes, fine. Thanks, Denise. I’ll see you later.’ ‘And we’re still on for Wednesday night!’ Denise answered from the doorway, before disappearing off to her own department. Elizabeth, of course, took in the whole thing from her desk. She didn’t know exactly what had been said, but she could guess the gist of it. Returning to his own desk, Stan confirmed it, saying, ‘Denise just announced that she’s going to be looking for a boyfriend. I think I’m relieved.’ ‘I thought that’s what you wanted, Stan. But, are you sure?’ Elizabeth asked. ‘Yes. Yes, of course. As Denise pointed out, though, it does mean I should expand my social circle a little.’ Stan was silent for a moment, and then he continued, ‘She said I should take up a hobby or something. I’ve never. Then I found the phone box and made the five minute (less!) call. Mum just liked to know I hadn’t fallen over a cliff, or been eaten by Welsh Cannibals (she didn’t have much idea about Wales apart from the fact they were small, wide and mined coal as a hobby). Fiona waited, laughing at the answers she could hear “Yes, Mum, I still have a pair of clean socks” (which was actually a lie, and I knew she knew it was, and she knew I knew – but she’d done her duty by asking. If I’d said no, I wondered if she’d have driven to West Wales with clean socks for me); “yes, yes, clean pants too” (actually that was true, walking in stiff pants is hell on the gonads). I stepped out and Fiona said “So, clean panty boy, fancy a pint? You’re buying”I did (fancy a pint) and I did (buy two). The bar man wasn’t sure about a woman having a pint, nor was he sure she was over age; we took them outside. Which was where Erica found us. She could barely speak. “Come quick. QUICK! Oh, no, call an ambulance.
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